Sabrina Benaim’s “Explaining My Depression to My Mother” is a heart-wrenching poem read aloud by Benaim herself in the National Poetry Slam competition in 2014. The poem being read aloud, as poetry is meant to be heard, has a seriously emotional impact, as the emotions laced in her voice are clear, but heart-breaking. As the title clearly states, the poem explains the despair of explaining depression to someone who does not and cannot understand. She depicts a conversation in which her mother wants to understand what is wrong with her daughter, but the daughter cannot find words to explain in a way she can understand. By the end of the conversation, Benaim states “Mom still doesn’t understand! Mom, can’t you see that neither can I?” (3:07). This ending statement shows that depression is a serious problem that is confusing even to the sufferer. Through her purposeful use of form, stylistic devices, as well as tone and mood, Benaim truly created a powerful spoken-word poem.
One reason Benaim’s poem is so powerful is because it has very loose form. It is free verse, with no set rhyme scheme and an irregular rhythm. Like depression, this poem is unpredictable and changes line per line, stanza per stanza, as depression changes on a day to day basis. It can be considered a narrative, as the poem is recounting events that occurred between herself and her mother. It may also be considered lyrical, as many emotions and feelings towards herself, depression, and her mother are expressed when Benaim is reading this poem aloud. Even when she reads this poem aloud, she has trouble containing her emotions. The delivery of her poem is crucial to get the full effect and significance. In addition to the words coming out of her mouth, her body language really impacts the meaning of the poem . As her reading continues, her arms tense and her body starts to shake with the beginning of a panic attack, and her voice begins to quiver as it supports the weight of the emotions she's describing at that very moment.
Benaim’s poem has a strong and powerful use of stylistic devices, laced with alliteration, personification and apostrophe. Alliteration is compelling in cases such as the “flicker of a flame” (0:31), “clumsy church bells” (1:56), “perhaps that part of the problem” (0:45). These statements are appealing to the ear, as well as attention catching. The personification of depression is truly a key part of the impact of the poem. Some key examples of Benaim’s personification of depression are “It is as small as a firefly in the palm of a bear, the next, it’s the bear.” (0:14), “Anxiety is the cousin visiting from out-of-town depression felt obligated to bring to the party.” (0:59), “But my depression always drags me back to my bed” (2:42). Depression is being personified like if it were a living person, as it cannot physically feel obligation/emotion, or physically drag Benaim back to her bed. The personification is important, as she is using it in an attempt to make her mother aware of how abnormal depression is, and how strong of a hold it has on her, as if it has the ability to physically control her.
Another strong use of stylistic devices is within another example of personification she mentions is where she says“... each night insomnia sweeps me up in his arms, dips me in the kitchen in the small glow of the stove-light” (1:33). Insomnia is a symptom stemming from depression, and as mentioned here, insomnia is also physically controlling her, similar to how her depression does. As well, apostrophe is used throughout the entire poem. The poem is designated to her mother, as clearly stated each of the many times she addresses her mother at the end of a statement. One of the most powerful statements of apostrophe is at the end, saying “Mom still doesn’t understand! Mom, can’t you see that neither can I?” (3:07). There is persuasive use of stylistic devices throughout “Explaining My Depression To My Mother” to explain the seriousness and confusion surrounding depression.
I truly enjoyed listening to this poem, and believe the way to get the most out of it is to listen to Sabrina Benaim read it aloud, as shown in this video. I believe it accurately portrays how although there are basic symptoms for depression, everyone experiences it differently. Benaim's personal experience, and her willingness to share that experience is truly inspirational.
One reason Benaim’s poem is so powerful is because it has very loose form. It is free verse, with no set rhyme scheme and an irregular rhythm. Like depression, this poem is unpredictable and changes line per line, stanza per stanza, as depression changes on a day to day basis. It can be considered a narrative, as the poem is recounting events that occurred between herself and her mother. It may also be considered lyrical, as many emotions and feelings towards herself, depression, and her mother are expressed when Benaim is reading this poem aloud. Even when she reads this poem aloud, she has trouble containing her emotions. The delivery of her poem is crucial to get the full effect and significance. In addition to the words coming out of her mouth, her body language really impacts the meaning of the poem . As her reading continues, her arms tense and her body starts to shake with the beginning of a panic attack, and her voice begins to quiver as it supports the weight of the emotions she's describing at that very moment.
Benaim’s poem has a strong and powerful use of stylistic devices, laced with alliteration, personification and apostrophe. Alliteration is compelling in cases such as the “flicker of a flame” (0:31), “clumsy church bells” (1:56), “perhaps that part of the problem” (0:45). These statements are appealing to the ear, as well as attention catching. The personification of depression is truly a key part of the impact of the poem. Some key examples of Benaim’s personification of depression are “It is as small as a firefly in the palm of a bear, the next, it’s the bear.” (0:14), “Anxiety is the cousin visiting from out-of-town depression felt obligated to bring to the party.” (0:59), “But my depression always drags me back to my bed” (2:42). Depression is being personified like if it were a living person, as it cannot physically feel obligation/emotion, or physically drag Benaim back to her bed. The personification is important, as she is using it in an attempt to make her mother aware of how abnormal depression is, and how strong of a hold it has on her, as if it has the ability to physically control her.
Another strong use of stylistic devices is within another example of personification she mentions is where she says“... each night insomnia sweeps me up in his arms, dips me in the kitchen in the small glow of the stove-light” (1:33). Insomnia is a symptom stemming from depression, and as mentioned here, insomnia is also physically controlling her, similar to how her depression does. As well, apostrophe is used throughout the entire poem. The poem is designated to her mother, as clearly stated each of the many times she addresses her mother at the end of a statement. One of the most powerful statements of apostrophe is at the end, saying “Mom still doesn’t understand! Mom, can’t you see that neither can I?” (3:07). There is persuasive use of stylistic devices throughout “Explaining My Depression To My Mother” to explain the seriousness and confusion surrounding depression.
I truly enjoyed listening to this poem, and believe the way to get the most out of it is to listen to Sabrina Benaim read it aloud, as shown in this video. I believe it accurately portrays how although there are basic symptoms for depression, everyone experiences it differently. Benaim's personal experience, and her willingness to share that experience is truly inspirational.